Let it all Out

Sometimes pain comes, sometimes pain goes, but the thing that never disappears is the scars.
Sometimes love comes, sometimes love goes, but the thing that never disappears are the memories.

I see, I hear, I smell, I breathe, I touch, I feel.

The best part is that there are those who easily forget that. Who we are easily becomes something someone else's words manipulate, something other try to change, something that is as invisible as a well cleaned glass.

What we end up wondering is, are we being the same as them? What they say about us is the truth? Are what others trying to change us into the best for us?

Hatred is something so strong, divided into other feelings. Jealousy, maybe? Or people just did wrong? Maybe it's just hurt talking. I can say for sure that the problem with those who hate me is jealousy and childishness. My problem with the people I hate is that the ones from the past hurt me beyond repair, and the most recent ones hurt the people I love and care about.

Maybe I don't care enough about myself.

Love? Yes, I'm capable of love. I love the people who are dearest to me, and unfortunately, most of them are away. Maybe in another town, maybe in another country, maybe in another continent. The people I love less, though? Which is known in my birth language as "adore"? I'm becoming indifferent to those.

People treat each other awfully sometimes. They ignore, they try to tell us who we are, they talk about us behind our backs...

Sometimes our heart is to ill too try and fight. Sometimes if we're not strong and swallow up everything, we'll eventually explode in ways we were planning on avoiding. Truth is, as much as we try, it's not only us controlling things. Oh, a drawing? Control that all you want. People, friendships, relationships... it's not just you.

And eventually, things will fail. Eventually, You will fail. And that cycle will repeat itself. You'll mourn over it how you have since you were 11, you'll blame yourself, you'll think that the people who are wrong are right, you'll start wanting some alone time, and eventually, you'll get depressed.

And in public you'll have to put up a facade. Be the usual cheery person you are, be the one your group of "friends" is used to, and realize how underneath all that, no one notices you're not okay. Notice how they still try to change you, how you still hear people talking behind your back, how you still hear lies about yourself... And you do what you always do.

Quietly, you wait for it all to end so you can move on with your life.

PhillGothDragon